When it is time for therapy...

To be honest, there is no "perfect" time for therapy. You can be in the camp that the world is caving in and we can't catch our breath. You can be in the camp of recognizing patterns and wanting to get ahead of it before your next phase. Or, even if everything seems absolutely wonderful, but you are wanting to bounce some ideas around as you make some decisions. My top 3 things that I would suggest if you are going to therapy for the first time or even switching up therapists is as follows:

1. Therapy can be as small or big as you make it. My biggest advice when it comes to therapy is be open and remember it is okay not to drink the Kool-Aid. Therapy is about having a conversation to help you think about things differently, to challenge your perspectives, and also support them when they are helping you live the life that you are wanting. Take what ya need and leave what you don't. In the end, you are the one who is going to know the decisions that are best for you.

2. Think about the style of therapy. There are a thousand different flavors of therapy and therapists. Are you wanting someone to "process" and listen? Are you wanting concrete skills with a therapist that is more "solution focused?" Are you wanting someone who is humorous? Someone who looks like you, from a similar background? Someone mature and who is seasoned? Are you wanting a fresh take and willing to take a chance on someone still in training? There is no one size fits all, but I do recommend that when you seek someone out picture the type of person and style that you would find most comfortable so you can be vulnerable.

3. Goals. What are your goals for therapy? Remember, emotions are normal, even the icky ones. So be completely free of anxiety, as much as I personally would love to be, not so realistic. Anxiety does serve its purpose. But if our goal is to learn skills to better manage anxiety and experience it less or talk through events that have triggered anxiety in hopes to process throughout so again we can decrease its control on our life than therapy definitely sounds like a good fit. Reflect on your goals. If it is marriage counseling, what specifically are you wanting to work on to make it better? If it is family, what aspects of the family dynamic would you like to see improved? If it is for self, what part of your journey are you wanting more support in? Now, goals tend to morph a bit in therapy and maybe once you start you might peel back the onion and see what you truly want to work on might shift and that's okay. That is actually the beauty of therapy. Digging deep. However, reflect on your goals first. Just a minor idea of them can lead you in the right direction for the type of therapy and therapist that will be best for you.

Best of luck friends!

L-A